Sunday, February 24, 2013

14 Random Acts of Kindness

Let's face it, I don't have the best relationship luck. So, every year when Valentine's Day comes around I usually try to bury my head in the sand or avoid it all together.

This year I tried something new. I decided to commit 14 random acts of kindness and invite all of my friends to do it too. I also asked them to invite their friends.

I wasn't sure what to expect. Initially the idea seemed somewhat popular with my closer friends but the facebook event stagnated at about 50 participants for several days, until February 13th. Remarkably, on the 13th the number of invitations soared from 700 to 3,500 and 300 people had indicated they planned to participate.

This was very exciting so I refreshed the facebook event every five minutes to watch the number grow. I also set up a blog where I hoped to share the stories of the participants who I encouraged to post their stories and pictures on facebook.

Valentine's Day itself was certainly one of the best I had. I started the day by preparing breakfast for my room mate and his lady friend. I left a Valentine for our landlords, gave out 6 flowers to 6 strangers, bought coffee for both of the people behind me in line at my regular coffee place AND gave the barristas baked goods. I even smiled at everyone who I passed on the street. At work I gave my immediate coworkers stars telling them why I thought they were wonderful, shared baked goods and gave our maintenance woman, whose patience and tact I admire greatly, a Valentine's Day card. I also wished everyone who called the office a Happy Valentine's Day. At lunch I participated in a 1 Billion Rising Flashmob raising awareness about violence against women. After work I met my room mate and a friend and gave out free hugs for an hour in a snow storm. At the end of our escapade I bought coffee for two young people who had been hired by a tax company to stand outside with signs advertising the firm.
 I was also the recipient of several acts. My good friend Alex sent a very kind email first thing in the morning, I received a gift card from a stranger while giving out free hugs and my room mate shared some soup with me for dinner.

At the end of the night, after my room mate left for his Lady Friend's place I went to bed happy, but also a little bit lonely and disappointed that more people hadn't decided to join in.

There were definitely a couple of challenges with the event that I hadn't anticipated.

A similar event called generosity day started circulating around the same time my did. The main difference was the exceptional use of multimedia tools to advertise and promote the event. They had gifs for people to use on their facebook pages and they even had a youtube video. I think that might have been one of the factors of the event not reaching more people. 

There were also somewhat more profound challenges.

Some of my friends and others had ideological and technical dilemmas about the event. Some people suggested that we should be kind everyday, which is true.Others were put off by the number of acts, 14. Of course there was nothing special about the number other than the event occurring on the 14th of February and instead it was more of a goal, but instead was a goal to strive for.  Others still seemed to be hung up on the possibility that because they had been invited to the event and asked to do a certain number of acts that any acts they did commit could not be random at all. Of course the randomness was never the point of the event. 

The goal of my event was to bring people together on a day that can be isolating, and do good in their communities. My hope was also that once people got started that they might just realize how easy it is to have a positive impact on an individual and on a community by doing something as simple as smiling at a stranger, and I'm happy to say that at least 300 of us did just that.

I think I might just do it again next year.

I hope you'll join me too.